Happy Mother's Day.

I dreamed of you. You came to talk to me every night. One night, as we were talking, I told her I've a crush on someone, and I also told her "Ummi, adik kahwin nanti Ummi have to be there tau!" Then you said "No one remembers me anymore. It seems like everyone has forgotten me, but you."

And then I woke up, I cried. I've never felt more crushed. How could she feel that way? How could she think her children have forgotten her? How could she possibly think anyone would ever forget the existence of an amazing woman, a miraculous mother? And, how could she leave me that very early?

I miss you Ummi. Not even a second you're not on my mind. I love you. I miss you so much it hurts. I miss your warm hugs. I wanna see your beautiful smile again, and I wanna be the reason for that. Why can't you wait? How could you not be here to see all these? I miss you. I don't know what to do now that I miss you so bad. I still have your number in my phone. I wish I could still call and cry to you telling you how much I miss you. It's been almost 7 years since you were gone. I could feel my heart breaking. I miss you. Ummi, I want you here. I'm feeling fine but I still want your hugs and kisses. I want you to be here for me. I miss you. I miss you so so so much. I miss you.