It feels like I've taken many things in life for granted. If I could just use the harsh word, an ungrateful child. I get everything I wanted, alhamdulillah God eased my path, especially educationally. This scholarship I'm having? Well yes I think I deserved it according to SPM results but not everyone with the same results as mine get the same opportunity. Yet here I am, complaining about every single little freaking thing in life.
Bila nak start jadi bersyukur Madihah? I guess it's not too late to start now. It's not gonna be easy getting rid of a bad habit but I'll try. I'm determined to change a certain way of how I handle my life. I've taken a major step (okay this is exaggerating, it's a simple silly step but it's major for me cause it was already a part of me, my daily routine) by taking it off of my schedule. My friend doubt I'll manage (even I do haha) she said it's just a phase and I'll get over it soon but well, it doesn't hurt to try. As of now I'm trying to just avoid it but it's still there at the back of my mind. I hope the day will come where I don't even give a crap about it.
Step 2 is another silly thing. My friend said I've a mental issue because I do this step 2 hahaha it is a bit crazy though, stupid even, maybe. But somehow it helps me tone down my surroundings, like, I don't know. I can't even describe the feeling it gives me but yeah. My friend asked "Are you gonna do this like, forever?" And I'm like "I don't know. I like it though." Haha
Maybe in a way she is right. I've some mental problem which isn't diagnosed. I'm unstable and I'm just....abnormal in so many ways. But like any normal person, I just wanna be happy and have a meaningful life.
Bila nak start jadi bersyukur Madihah? I guess it's not too late to start now. It's not gonna be easy getting rid of a bad habit but I'll try. I'm determined to change a certain way of how I handle my life. I've taken a major step (okay this is exaggerating, it's a simple silly step but it's major for me cause it was already a part of me, my daily routine) by taking it off of my schedule. My friend doubt I'll manage (even I do haha) she said it's just a phase and I'll get over it soon but well, it doesn't hurt to try. As of now I'm trying to just avoid it but it's still there at the back of my mind. I hope the day will come where I don't even give a crap about it.
Step 2 is another silly thing. My friend said I've a mental issue because I do this step 2 hahaha it is a bit crazy though, stupid even, maybe. But somehow it helps me tone down my surroundings, like, I don't know. I can't even describe the feeling it gives me but yeah. My friend asked "Are you gonna do this like, forever?" And I'm like "I don't know. I like it though." Haha
Maybe in a way she is right. I've some mental problem which isn't diagnosed. I'm unstable and I'm just....abnormal in so many ways. But like any normal person, I just wanna be happy and have a meaningful life.
No comments:
Post a Comment