A thousand years.

That's how long I've been neglected this blog. Well, it feels like it. I don't know why I feel down lately. I read someone's blog, about him spilling what he feels, and I realize I haven't done that for a very long time.

My posts on Tumblr, it's always about guys I've a crush on, not really a crush, more like .... I don't know how to explain, but it's just not about ME.

Life has been treating me like shit lately, the only distraction is my job. It's tiring and I always end up sleeping straight away after I had my shower. But at times like this, when I'm alone and I got no one to talk to and I just can't sleep, all the bad things that happen to me will hit my brain.

I'll become emotional [like now]. It's silly, no? I can always choose to think about stuffs that make me happy, but I choose the opposite instead. It feels like there's nothing good happening to me lately, the results? Heh. Not that I'm not thankful to get such an astounding result, it's just that, ntah lah, lets not get to that one.

My life seems to get worse one day after another. I feel unloved and unappreciated by my own family, I feel like my close friends drifting away, I feel lonely and miserably at all times. The hole in my heart seems to grow bigger and bigger as time passes by. It's killing me.

I wanna get away from here. I wanna start a new life. I just.....I just wanna be happy.