I've been reading my older posts since the last couple of days. I reached the very first post of this blog (not my first post ever - because I've hidden the posts I wrote in highchool. Too embarrassing haha)
So this blog has all the stories post-school era. First post on this blog was my "freedom" from high school, last day of SPM.
I realised many things though. First, I've improved a lot on my grammar (though some are merely typos, but they really annoy me). Two, I've never changed. Three, life's obvious cycle of ups and downs.
It's surprising how motivational my own words are. I feel like I'm in the most depressing year of my life, like I've never been this stressed out, but I have been this stressed out before. I've never changed - in the sense that I'm not good dealing with exam stress. My emotional posts are all related to exam stress, and...guy-issue stress, lol.
While we're at the guy issue part, I can't help missing the good old times. I came across the post I wrote about Saiful, about how I used to have a crush on him, with a footnote saying "I don't know if he remembers any of these? I wonder how he would react if he reads this?" Because I honestly didn't think he knows I have a blog, let alone read it. Like sumpah, I really really really didn't expect him to read that post. Sekaliiiiiiiii he replied saying he remembers all that and was flabbergasted I was like "Shhhhhhiiitttttt" hahahaha I blush when I read that hahaha
And also, I can't help missing Hakeem. Not the now-Hakeem, the old-Hakeem, (they're the same person all right but they're different, get it?). I came across a post where I wrote the text he sent to me; one which I've totally forgotten. When I read that I was like, "He said that to me before?" It said something like this "I'm sorry for hurting you. Sorry dear, I truly am. I was confused. Our memories, unforgettable. What are you hoping for? Like dulu, apa you harapkan?" Probably at that time, hati dah tawar, things just went over my head, tak simpan dah.
Reading about the good happy days pulak, rindu nya rasa. Reading about the tough days, but I was such a strong girl at heart, very positive about life and God, what happened to her?
Try to find it within you again Madihah. I believe she's still there somewhere.
So this blog has all the stories post-school era. First post on this blog was my "freedom" from high school, last day of SPM.
I realised many things though. First, I've improved a lot on my grammar (though some are merely typos, but they really annoy me). Two, I've never changed. Three, life's obvious cycle of ups and downs.
It's surprising how motivational my own words are. I feel like I'm in the most depressing year of my life, like I've never been this stressed out, but I have been this stressed out before. I've never changed - in the sense that I'm not good dealing with exam stress. My emotional posts are all related to exam stress, and...guy-issue stress, lol.
While we're at the guy issue part, I can't help missing the good old times. I came across the post I wrote about Saiful, about how I used to have a crush on him, with a footnote saying "I don't know if he remembers any of these? I wonder how he would react if he reads this?" Because I honestly didn't think he knows I have a blog, let alone read it. Like sumpah, I really really really didn't expect him to read that post. Sekaliiiiiiiii he replied saying he remembers all that and was flabbergasted I was like "Shhhhhhiiitttttt" hahahaha I blush when I read that hahaha
And also, I can't help missing Hakeem. Not the now-Hakeem, the old-Hakeem, (they're the same person all right but they're different, get it?). I came across a post where I wrote the text he sent to me; one which I've totally forgotten. When I read that I was like, "He said that to me before?" It said something like this "I'm sorry for hurting you. Sorry dear, I truly am. I was confused. Our memories, unforgettable. What are you hoping for? Like dulu, apa you harapkan?" Probably at that time, hati dah tawar, things just went over my head, tak simpan dah.
Reading about the good happy days pulak, rindu nya rasa. Reading about the tough days, but I was such a strong girl at heart, very positive about life and God, what happened to her?
Try to find it within you again Madihah. I believe she's still there somewhere.
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