Fluffy.

 I’m feeling a little stressed out about a few things. Some things triggered me, which I really wish they hadn’t. But again, instead of going back to the things Zac taught me to stay grounded, my mind goes back to him, lol. Having him in my head keeps me grounded, talking to him in my head keeps me grounded, knowing that I’ll be seeing him to unload the mess in my head keeps me grounded.

I’m not gonna deny I like him. As much as everyone around me asking me to be careful about it, I wouldn’t mind admitting that I do like him. How can I not when he’s the person who provides for me what I need most - feeling safe, secured and heard. For that one hour in every two weeks, he’s there to listen to whatever crap I have in my head, stupid things that trigger me, the fighting voices in my head, my ridiculous repetitive dreams. He’s always there saying the right words, telling me things I need to hear in a way that it’s stuck in my head for weeks giving me a feel of peace. So yes, how can I not like him? But all these, with a clear boundary in my head of the professional relationship we are in.

He taught me what I’d want in my relationship, what a healthy relationship feels like. I’m so glad I met you.