When your house is not the place you call 'home'.

I'm sick of being the one who has to apologize for everything. I'm tired of being the one who has to say sorry for everyone else's faults. Is it cause I'm the youngest? Is it because of my age I have no rights to stand up for what's right and what's wrong? Is it because of my age I don't deserve any respect from older people? I don't mind saying sorry if it really is my fault, or even if it's not, I'm fine saying sorry if it can fix stuffs. But this time it's too much. Way beyond the limit.

I'm done with all this. I never thought I'd feel this way again. I felt it back when I was in my first semester in KTT for a different issue, of course. That feeling where you just hate being there. You'd do anything to not go back. Back then, I'd rather spend my weekends at KTT laughing around with my seniors who hardly go back since they're from Perak and Kedah. It was fun.

In semester two, things changed. Every weekend, I look forward to go to a place that I called 'home'. Now things are changing again. It's Sunday morning, and I was already back in KTT last night. KTT feels more like home now though. So yeah, seems like I'll be spending my following weekends here at my spectacularly beautiful college.

Have they no idea that I am a human being with feelings too? It hurts more than any of you can ever think of. It's not like you guys ever think about it. Most of the time I wonder if I ever mean anything to all of you. Most of the time I'm very certain with my answer to it. Dah la. Orang tak kisah pasal kita takkan nak terhegeh-hegeh kan? I'm done with all this, I just can't wait to leave, to see my mom. If you get what I mean. Later, assalamualaikum.